Is Dating An End, Or The Necessary Means To A New Beginning?
“Yes! I’ve met my dream lady”, “O I’d like to spend the rest of my life with this saint of a man”, “if s/he leaves, I really don’t know what I’d do with my life”, I will be dating my dream man.
The above are beautiful affirmations of passion, but sadly, they are almost always words unspoken, just thoughts – and when they eventually become too strong for our heads and we decide to spill then from our mouths, it might then be too late as mayhap, a partner might have assumed that the other isn’t as much interested in him/her as s/he is in the other. Yes! That goes for the both parties.
We must have heard of situations where a partner, after a long time or being with the other; dating, sexing, shopping here and there, catching all kinds of fun, etc. still laments at the end of the day that s/he was only used and abandoned as the other show no sign of further interest in any way. I’m talking marriage.
It then begs the question of “what went wrong?”
There might be a thousand and one reasons that happened, some may be in-fact, solid. But more often than not, the root of such ugly outcome is purpose, or lack of it.
Let me expand a little more.
Life isn’t a merry-go-round, because a merry-go-round is directionless – and when any activity or engagement of one’s life lacks direction, then s/he will just keep turning aimlessly until some force pushes him/her from that activity. This goes with dating too.
Dating could be so many things to so many people, but it’s never an end in any relationship, instead, it’s the necessary means to a new beginning. So when you wish to date someone and you finally decide you’d spend the rest of your life with that person, then waste no time at indicating such.
You might not necessarily go all “will you marry me?” right away, but try to make away with trivial conversations, instead you start chipping in things like, “how would you raise your children?”, “what do you think about having your own family?” “I’d really love to meet those luckiest parents of yours and get familiar with them”, “Oh you’d make a good father/mother you know”.
These are purposeful indications for one who has truly discern where s/he wants his/her love life headed. And not just that it gives you direction, it also helps you ascertain if the other partner is actually serious about you or is only playing with your body and feelings.
As a final note, do not dive further into a romantic relationship if the other partner is only out to satisfy himself or herself with your money, body or feelings. Dating isn’t an end, and it never should be.